@emaree The things you've had to say here are important, but the way you've said them could be better. ^^;
Phrases like "Are you for real?" will immediately put them on the defensive and ignore you. Speak to the matter, not the emotion. As an example, for that last bullet point:
"There is no office or organization qualified to determine the authenticity of a transgender person, as any trans friendly therapist will tell you; such a qualification is only transphobic rhetoric."